I think I have bipolar disorder

Yes that's right. Bipolar. I was just thinking about myself and how down I am and trying to think about when I am in a good mood. And my moods are extreme. Then I googled bipolar and it described me. I think I mitt have a more mild case. I can't go to the doctor though bec I don't want my parents to have to pay for a doctors visit. My dads work has been slow. I haven't been to the doctors or dentist in a long time. I don really know what to do. But when I am in a manic state I love it. I have endless amounts of energy and everythin is always clean and I don't need to eat and I lose weight fast. Manic state please come back to me! I miss you